Fever.

I can’t be certain of what happened but I’m pretty sure it went like this:

He changed his mind. It feels like a sudden fever that spreads from your head into the rest of your body making you ache with the sickness of fear. I felt in my bones, my lungs and my heart. It shivered through my veins, moving like poison. He has changed his mind about me. It’s hard to hear the reasons when all you can think is; I wasn’t perfect enough. I contain my despair and force my howl into the dark. I still love you. How can I ever love myself if he doesn’t love me?

Love is only beautiful when it has been blemished by sadness. Always, you feel most alive when you're ready to die.